count it all joy...

"Count it all joy my brothers when you face trials of various kinds."  James 1:2

This is one of my favorite verses...  when everything is going well and I want to encourage others.

But in the midst of this whole knee fiasco, it's been hard for me to love this verse, to like this verse, and to even trust this verse.

I honestly feel like this knee thing will never end.  It's been ongoing for over six weeks now.  I had surgery yesterday.  And I should be done, right?

Wrong...

The physical therapist today recommended an MRI on my left knee now.  BUT the doctor doesn't think I need it...  he just thinks I need therapy.

But the therapist doesn't want to give me therapy until he rules out damage from the MRI.

So... the therapist can't order me an MRI without the doctor's approval and he won't give me therapy without the MRI.

So, I'm stuck again...  in the place where I've been all along...  doctor's don't agree, and I don't know who to listen to.

I'm in tons of pain.  I miss my sweet Emily like crazy.  I want to be at school, but I'm here...  in this trial.

And I'm supposed to count it all joy.

...for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. James1:3,4


I know these verses, I believe these verses, but man it's hard to truly live these verses in the midst of a trial.

But deep down inside, I count this all joy because I know that:

He causes everything to work together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.  Romans 8:28

He turns ashes into beauty.

He uses my pain for His glory.

And because... He's already there.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgFLjlzbSp4&feature=player_embedded

thoughts on community

com·mu·ni·ty

   /kəˈmyunɪti/ Show Spelled[kuh-myoo-ni-tee]
a social, religious, occupational, or other group sharing common characteristics or interests and perceived or perceiving itself as distinct in some respect from the larger society within which it exists.

THOUGHTS AND EXPERIENCES

During the past few years, I've heard lots of teachings on what it means to live in biblical community.  I've been involved in several Community Groups and Life Groups and they have all looked drastically different depending on people, location, common interests and walks of life.

The one thing all of these "communities" have in common, however, is that these aren't just groups, or something to be a part of once a week or once a month.  Community is a way of life. 

COLLEGE GIRLS COMMUNITY

When Emily was 6 months old, we moved to San Marcos and I went back to college.  In all honesty, I was scared to death to move away from family and friends and embark on the single mom college student journey alone.

But I wasn't alone.  The Lord graciously surrounded me with numerous girl friends who helped out with Emily, saw our needs, loved us to pieces, and lived life with us. I didn't realize it then, but these girls were my Community.

"And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. "  1 Thessalonians 5:14

SAN MARCOS COMMUNITY GROUP

The next year, there were several San Marcos peeps who attended our church in Austin, but were looking for community in San Marcos.  We met every Tuesday, fellowshipped, encouraged, and shared about what was going on in our lives.

But it didn't stop there.  These people were available during the week to live life alongside each other.  I never felt obligated to wait until next Tuesday to see them again or talk to them.  These awesome brothers and sisters were my Community.

"And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near."  Hebrews 10:24-25

FIRST YEAR OF TEACHING COMMUNITY

My first year of teaching was probably my easiest in the respect to teaching, but was all very challenging in trying to figure out how to balance and find the energy to teach 5 year olds all day and come home to a 3 year old.... all by myself.

But I wasn't by myself, at all.  People were everywhere.  People from school, people from church, people down the road, and people on every country road between my house and school.  These people often saw my needs before I did, and were always available.  They intentionally lived life alongside us.  They were my Community.

"Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality."  Romans 12:9-21

BELOW THE SURFACE COMMUNITY

My first 2 years of teaching, I also attended a group study at my church every week.  Our purpose was to get to the root of our past and present struggles, trials and tribulations.  To be transparent in hopes of finding healing and restoration while offering hope and encouragement to others.

This was the In The Basement kind of community...  The TrueFaced kind of Community.

This kind of community is hard to find, hard to develop, but is the kind most of us long for.

Man, you guys were hard to leave!  So glad I am still able to be connected even with an ocean between us.

"Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. " Galatians 6:2

"But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin." 1 John 1:7


FACEBOOK COMMUNITY

Yes, Facebook Community!  You guys have been awesome, especially since we moved Somewhere Over the Rainbow.

I feel closer to a lot of you now than I did when we were in the States!  Your prayers and encouragement have played a huge part in keeping us going, picking us up when things are hard, and keeping us connected to things that are familiar and comfortable.

You really have been a great community and have lived life alongside us even from a different country!

"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." Proverbs 17:17

AUSTIN STONE COMMUNITY

Let's just say I miss you guys SO MUCH!  When I was in Beijing a couple of weeks ago, prepping for TWO KNEE SURGERIES, (which I still can't believe I almost did)!, I was really, really discouraged and disappointed.

A friend from The Stone posted my prayer need on The City, which is similar to a Facebook Network for our church.  The next day I woke up with over 50 emails of encouragement from brothers and sisters I didn't even know!

You guys inspired me and encouraged me more than I can possibly articulate.

You were just the type of Community I needed in that moment.

"And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22:37-40

CHINESE COMMUNITY

I have learned a LOT from the Chinese Community.  In China, community isn't really an option. Like I said before, it's a way of life.  In China, it's a means for survival.  You need each other here.

My eyes were really opened when I thought I might be having knee surgery here in Shenyang.  In the hospitals here, the nurses don't really take care of you.  Your family does.

And I was trying to wrap my mind around what that would like for me here.  People would need to bring me meals and water, etc.  The hospital would just provide me a bed to sleep in and the rest would have been up to "family".

The Chinese... they live life alongside each other every day.  It's not a choice.  It's not a group.  It's a way of life.  The Chinese...  they get it.

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken." Ecclesiastes 4:9-12


MY CHINA COMMUNITY

During this ridiculous knee saga (which is still ongoing), my China Community has just graciously overwhelmed us with love, encouragement and support.

They are here for us.  All the time.  When we need food, they give us food.  When we need company, they visit.  When Emily needed to get out of the house and I couldn't walk down the stairs, they took her to get some fresh air.  When I couldn't get up the stairs, they carried me.  When the medical world sucked every penny out of my hands, the Lord used my China Community to provide.

When we didn't know what to do, they prayed.  When I cried, they encouraged.  When I couldn't do things I needed to do, they stepped up.

And as I get ready to give this doctor thing another go tomorrow, they are right here alongside us cheering us on.  These guys are my Community.

“You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people's feet. “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven." Matthew 5:13-16

Community- a way of life.

 

"As long as your life involves Truth and People, you are on the right track."  ~Tommy Barnett

looking through wheelchair-colored glasses...

Granted, I was only wheelchair-ridden for a few days, my eyes have been wide opened, I've gained a new perspective, I've encountered much frustration, and have learned to appreciate the smallest of small things.

My first wheelchair encounter was in the airport as we got ready to fly out to Beijing.  The handicap service in the Shenyang airport is phenomenal.  They went above and beyond to do everything they could to help me!

When we got to the gate, we realized I had to WALK down some stairs to the tram which takes us to the airplane.  This was a problem considering they made me check my crutches at the baggage claim.

The guards spent about 15 minutes brainstorming a plan before they decided to take me through a back way down a few ramps and elevators and wheel me out to the tram.  They then lifted me (in my wheelchair) onto the tram and it drove out to the airplane. 

Once we got to the airplane, we had to climb up the stairs to the plane.  Once again... dilemma.  It took them a while to decide how they were going to do this, but they teamworked it and carried me (in my wheelchair) up the stairs.

I just couldn't fathom the thought that they had never faced this dilemma before.  Surely that have, right!?

Once I got up there, the wheelchair was too wide for the walk-way and I didn't have crutches, so I had to hobble to my seat.  This was so painful and frustrating and embarrassing because everyone was staring!

On the way back, the handicap service in Beijing didn't even begin to compare.  We were pretty much on our own.  Thank goodness I had a GREAT friend to go with me!

FRUSTRATIONS

-People stare at me anyways because I'm a "waigouren" (foreigner), but I was stared at a LOT!
-My independence was pretty much stripped completely!  It was very frustrating not to be able to do many normal everyday things on my own.
-People stare instead of help.  When we would struggle to get up a ramp or on a sidewalk, some people would just stare and see how we were going to figure out this dilemma on our own.
-China is not handicap accessible hardly anywhere...  I don't know how the handicap do it!

APPRECIATIONS

-On the other hand lots of people SMILED at me!
-Many people offered their assistance.
-If there was a ramp (which we only found one that I can recall), I was led to it immediately.
-The guy at the hotel who ran to me every time the elevator door opened and led me down the ramp and said in his best Chinglish, "Every ding going to be ok," as he gave me a high five... well that just makes you smile!

NEW PERSPECTIVE

-Be grateful for what I can do.
-Appreciate those who help with what I can't do.
-Smile at those in need.
-And offer a hand every once in a while.
-Reach out.
-Look for someone who's in need.  We are everywhere!


 "He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us."  2 Corinthians 1:4

knee update...

Disclaimer:  This post is extremely boring BUT you may just get a kick out of everything I've gone through to make this post possible!

BACKGROUND INFORMATION

I tore my right medial meniscus playing basketball in 2002 and had arthroscopic surgery.  I haven't had any trouble with it since... until now.  So hey, I got 10 years out of the deal.

WHAT DID I DO!?

This time, something in the back of my right knee popped during a Tae Bo work out and I stopped the workout immediately.  Though I felt quite a bit of discomfort the next 10 days, I was still able to be pretty active--hiking, walking up stairs, etc.  Around day 10, I could barely walk and decided to stay off of it for a few days.

I elevated it, iced it, and stayed in my apartment for an entire week and it got worse.  I used crutches to walk around my house, so I wasn't using it much.  During this time, my left knee also became very painful and I was hardly able to walk or stand on either.  Standing was really difficult.

FIRST DOCTOR'S VISIT

In China, there are not doctor's offices, just hospitals.  So if you have a cold, you go to the hospital.  I still struggle with that terminology.  My heart always skips a beat when I hear someone went to the hospital...  and it turns out...  their nose is just a dripping faucet, that's all.

So, I went to the hospital.  And I ordered my own MRI.  Because I just guessed that's what I needed, and that's how things are done here, if you want them to be.  So... I've done this before, right?  And I've worked in an MRI facility.  Figured I had some torn cartilage or ligaments, and in radiology school, I learned that you use MRI's for that.  So I ordered myself an MRI.

I went back 2 days later to see the orthopedic doctor who was going to read my MRI.  So, picture yourself at the DMV.  I had my number.  And I was just a number.  Understandable in China, I guess.  But frustrating.  So there were several of us standing in line at the doctor's door with our MRI.  We knew who was next by looking at screen with our numbers on it.  Each person walked in and was out in less than 5 minutes!  I just couldn't believe it.

So, I walked in with my 3 translators. :)  We were a good team by the way!  And the doctor had absolutely no interest in looking at my knee.  He basically looked at my films and said I may have some cartilage damage.  He did say my medial meniscus was fine, but could not rule out a lateral meniscus tear. He told me to rest it for a couple of weeks...  which I had been doing and it obviously wasn't working.  My friend had to ask the guy to look at my knee!  Still--diagnosis--- you are okay, go home and rest...

Considering I couldn't walk, I obviously was not satisfied with these results.

2ND DOCTOR ENCOUNTER

One of the Western family doctors here was very kind and came to my house and did a physical knee exam.  This was very painful and caused my right knee to swell and hurt for the rest of the evening.  He suggested that I either see an ortho doctor (which I'd already done ), or immobilize my leg for a few weeks.

But school is starting soon, so I had to keep trying!

3RD DOCTOR'S VISIT

-After I called all over the country, seriously... I called Hong Kong, Korea, Shanghai, and Beijing!   I ended up visiting a knee specialist in Beijing who did x-rays on both knees.  He concluded that I had cartilage damage in both knees on the backs of my kneecaps.  He also said my knee caps are crooked and my Left one is higher than it should be.  He wanted to scope both knees and smooth out the cartilage on my kneecaps.

My problem with his diagnosis is that none of my pain is related to my kneecaps.  I have had severe pain in the backs of my knees, especially when straightening my legs and standing flat footed (I've found myself walking on my toes).  Also, the outer tendon/ligament in my Right knee hurts severely when I turn my foot inward or pivot.

I was scheduled for TWO KNEE SURGERIES and somehow was convinced that I needed them!  I'm very fortunate I had a day in between my visit and the actual surgeries...  which I really tried to push up a day!

I really wasn't at peace about the whole situation, so I sought a...  4th opinion?

4TH AND 5TH DOCTOR ENCOUNTER

I Skyped with an orthopedic doctor who lives in China but is currently in the States and he was able to discuss some of my options and give me his opinions on things.

Three hours before I went in for pre-op, a surgeon from my church in Texas Skyped me.  I didn't know him and was SO GRATEFUL to be able to make this connection!  I was able to send him my MRI and X-ray images.  He advised me not to do the surgery and to start with a Cortisone shot and oral steroids.

This was a really HARD DECISION to make 3 hours before going in for surgery!  Especially since I was supposed to fast.  I was trying to squeeze in my last bite before knowing if it was actually going to be my last bite.  haha

I definitely didn't feel at peace about the surgery after my Skype conversations.  I finally had 2 doctors agree on something, so that was comforting!  So, I canceled the surgeries, and we had a friend look for airplane tickets for us.  We were almost certain we couldn't get out that day.  Our friend called back immediately and asked if we could get on a plane in 2 hours, so we did!

God was saying, "Get out of there!"

6TH AND 7TH DOCTOR'S VISIT

I went to a small Western Clinic here in Shenyang, hoping to get the Cortisone shot.  It took 2 visits, but I finally got the shot yesterday and am feeling much better today.  He also gave me a couple of exercises to do, so I started those today, as well.

My concern is that the Cortisone is only a temporary relief.  Since no one was able to rule out a lateral meniscus tear and many of my symptoms lean toward that way, I'm not sure what to do to avoid hurting it worse.  I will be going back to the States during Christmas break, so if I could hang on until then, that would be great.

I walked without crutches and knee braces for the first time today in about 2 weeks, so that was a GREAT FEELING! 

I am SO THANKFUL for EVERYONE who has been praying, encouraging, cooking, babysitting, listening, visiting, checking in, translating, escorting, making phone calls, and carrying me up the stairs! 

I COULD NOT DO THIS WITHOUT ANY OF YOU!

School starts in FOUR DAYS, and I will be there!