So, this week marks our one month anniversary of China living. I can hardly believe it! I am disappointed at the lack of "China News" I have for you tonight. Our lives have been so consumed with school and adjusting to new routines, that we haven't done much China exploring. BUT, it's coming, no doubt. :)
WHAT IS HE TEACHING ME?
HIS STRENGTH, NOT MINE
In all honesty, adjusting and acclomating to this new life has been much harder than I expected. I've experienced a lot of change in my life before. Drastic change. I've moved before. I've started new jobs. I've met new people. I've been "on my own" for a while. I've lived in different states from my family. And when things have been hard, I've persevered, pushed through it, and always made it out on the other side. So, here I am, and things are hard. Harder than expected. I'm not even sure what's hard to be exact... just so much change. Nothing is familiar. But I am strong. But some days I don't feel strong. But maybe that's it... I'm not strong. He is strong. And when I forget that, when I attempt to do things my own way, in my own strength, I become weak. And sometimes, still... it's my weakness that reminds me that "the joy of the Lord is my Strength".
What is He teaching me? "My power is made perfect in your weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9
HIS TIMING, NOT MINE
Well, time management has definitely not been a strength of mine since I've been here. I was a master at time management in The States. But here... not even close. I am realizing how precious and valuable my time and my routines are to me. I guess they give me some sense of comfort, or control, or sanity at least. But in China, I am dependent on public transportation, so I have very little or no control over when or how long it's going to take me to get somewhere, or even how long it's going to take to actually find transportation. It's very difficult to map out our day and schedule a routine. Because, really, I have no control. And just FYI, everything, I mean EVERYTHING, takes longer in China. And I knew this before coming here. I've been here. I've been prepared and warned and informed. BUT that hasn't made it any easier.
What is He teaching me? Trust Him and HIS timing.
IT'S NOT ABOUT ME
Regardless of how humble I want to be, I am selfish by nature. I can name hundreds of things I want, I'd like, I long for. I can probably name a hundred things I did this week for my own selfish gain. I can name hundreds of things I would change, just so I can be satisfied. But at the end of the day, in the midst of my weakness, and my horrible timing, and my selfishness, I ask myself why I am here. I ask Him why I'm here. And all I know is, it's not about ME.
What is He teaching me? It's not about me.
FROM THE INSIDE OUT
(lyrics from Hillsong United-these words always encourage me)
A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
My heart and my soul, I give You control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise, become my embrace
To love You from the inside out
Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing you praise
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
My heart, my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise
From the inside out
EMILY UPDATES
Emily, on the other hand, is adjusting 100 x better than I expected. She loves China, loves her school, loves the adventure, and is acclomating very well. I am so proud of her!
We have had more and more "Rise and Shine" mornings, which I am very grateful for!
Our apartment is slowly coming together. We are taking it one room at a time. We finished Emily's room today, and she absolutely loves it!
To be continued...
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